Last Week's Critique

Putting up all the storyboards I submitted for class is kind of a hassle, but in summary, these are things that were of mainly of concern, that I remember:

1. Too many close ups
2. need to figure out way to make the female character stronger
3. Some shots could be made stronger, such as a stronger reveal for the girl, etc

Some issues that people talked about during the critique raised some personal concerns about the story as well. They were not necessarily a problem, per se, but I felt uncomfortable with it. This includes:

1. The story is very cliche - just about a guy who dreams that he saves a girl, and then snaps out of the dream.
2. The female character is stereotypical
3. Kevin and Ralph do not have much of a role
4. People interpret Ray as a "jerk" - I didn't want him to come off that way, actually. I wanted people to like him.
5.  Looks like an "anime"

I think it is natural for my work to resemble anime because that's what I was influenced by. However, I want it to look like GOOD anime....not the crappy kind. I did feel uncomfortable with the fact that I had so many close ups, so I will try to be more aware of that.

As for the story, I've been working and reworking the story, and considering a completely NEW story all weekend. It was an extremely painful process!!!!!! The whole time I felt like I was getting nothing done, until it paid off in the end and all my ideas started coming together....

I think I've decided on something I like, but I am a bit apprehensive about the production of it. I wanted to finish my film completely and have time to refine it--which is why I chose to set my film in ONE interior setting.  I wanted to make the film around 3 minutes, the minimum, and focus on making it look good. However, there is so much going on it might stream to 5 or 6 minutes...or, I fear, even more. There is also a lot of difficult animation in it. In addition, I was thinking of adding some 3D elements to it, which brings up more complications. It's not just producing the animation, but also struggling with the programs that I am afraid will take up a lot of time.

I'm going to post my new treatment up (draft SIX.....=_=) in the following post. Sheila, is it doable?

Time to thumbnail like the WIND!